The best things in life come in fours: 4-somes, 3-somes where a surprise guest shows up, 5-somes where the ugly person is running late. And now for a limited time, when you buy 3 pairs of underwear, get a 4th pair free! (Image: Existing image of 3 pairs of men’s & women’s underwear with black outlines of 4th pairs) [CTA: “I could finally wear underwear most days of the week!”]

Why are we giving away extra underwear? Because every time YOU add a pair of underwear to your cart, WE have to keep track of how many pairs are in there, and frankly math is really hard. [CTA: “Start filling your cart”]

I mean, a PAIR of socks is 2 socks, but a PAIR of underwear is 1 underwear?? Uh, ok if you say so, Einstein. (Image: Einstein at a chalkboard, add two hand drawn chalk socks and a pair of underwear on the blackboard)

So for a limited time, 1+1+1=4. Our bad math is your good deal. (Image: Existing image of 3 pairs of men’s & women’s underwear with black outlines of 4th pairs) [CTA: “Buy 3 Pairs & Get the 4th Free”] Unfortunately, you missed out on our 1+1+1=111 promotion. That sale almost put us out of business.

Stay Weird & Whistle While You Perk

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This extremely tasteful, hand-crafted, organic, non-gmo, vegan, gluten-free email was designed by Dain and written by Nate. There are 2 types of people in this world: I don’t wanna brag, but in high school I got a D in math. The 4th highest letter! Not bad.

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